Make extensive notes about behaviors observed at home. Give examples of particular situations that illustrate concerns. Outline methods used, specifically those that seemed to work and those that backfired. Share any other professional advice that has been sought and results of any previous evaluations. If any previous conversations have occurred with your child's teacher, include notes from those meetings and conversations as well.
Call your child's teacher to share your concerns. Set up a face-to-face meeting with the teacher to discuss the situation.
Share your information with the teacher during the meeting. Ask her to share the same kinds of observations with you. Take note of any similarities and discrepancies you may find.
Work together to try to identify any possible causes or triggers for the negative behaviors. Prioritize the behaviors that need immediate attention. Create strategies for possible solutions. Decide if you would also like to enlist the help of a social worker or pediatrician.
Map out the plan and write it down. Set up specific procedures and communication routines. Designate roles in the process and be sure to communicate the plan to all involved. Be sure to set up a meeting after a week or two to discuss any progress and to make any changes.
Make an agreement with the teacher to commit to the same methods of addressing the negative behaviors at home and at school. Consistent negative results from actions will give the child a reason to think twice before behaving in the same away. This prevents the confusion of getting away with something in one area of her life and being discipline about it in another.
Continue to experiment and try different methods as a team until the behavior problems are solved. This will usually only take one or two tries, but be patience because each child is different.