Recognize your parenting style. As well as emotional coaching, other approaches to parenting include the "laissez-faire" approach of letting children develop as they will, the "disapproving parents" where strong emotions are punished, and the dismissive "get over it" style.
Do some soul-searching. Recognize that individuals often parent the way they were parented. Think about whether you can recognize your own emotions as being reflected back to you through the children.
Learn to recognize when the children are angry, happy, upset, afraid or sad. Too often parents or caregivers are caught up in their own adult world and they don't see what children are going through. Make it a habit to do a visual check followed by a question of how they are feeling from time to time.
Be empathetic. Discuss your emotions and feelings. A good way for your child to develop empathy is to realize that you, too, have emotions and feelings. The theory of "lead by example" works well when you want to be an effective emotional coach.
Listen to what the children have to say. One of the most important things emotional coaches can do is spend time really listening to children, because it helps them feel supported. Maintaining eye contact is also a good strategy.
Name the emotions to help children express what they are feeling. Under the rubric of "happiness," for example, use words like "pleased," "content," and "delighted." Other words for "sad" include "miserable," "disappointed," and "unhappy."
Keep an emotional diary. Teach children to keep track of their emotions throughout the day and to monitor them. Set up a check-in schedule of first thing in the morning, mid-morning, noon, mid-afternoon, early evening and last thing before bed. See if there is a regular pattern and if there is, look at addressing it.
Balance solutions and limits. While you are empathetic when being an emotional coach, it is also important not to allow children to behave inappropriately under the guise of expressing their emotions.