Aggressive communication is characterized by an angry style of speech that frequently interrupts others. The speech is often directed at the listener in the second person, such as in making accusations. Aggressive communication is one-sided and tends to belittle or discount the listener, so it is generally not an effective style to use in situations involving peers or employees. Aggressive communication is useful in disciplinary situations. Since aggressive speech conveys your personality as hostile, adult listeners are likely to respond antagonistically when communicated with in this way.
Passive communication is a reserved style of speaking. When engaged in passive communication, the speaker withholds most or all of his thoughts and emotions and is overtly agreeable to others. For this reason, passive communication is not an effective style when you wish to communicate your true feelings. Instead, passive communication is used to defuse social situations. For example, when responding to someone who is angry, passive communication may be the best option to placate the situation.
Passive-aggressive communication is a situation in which the speaker conveys an outward appearance of passiveness while harboring aggressive sentiments. Passive-aggressive communication often manifests in sarcastic remarks and other indirect methods of aggression. The only situations in which passive-aggressive communication is effective are those in which you wish to antagonize the other participant. With passive-aggressive speech, the speaker is able to vent his anger while not being blatantly aggressive. However, the contrast between communication style and inner sentiment develops a cognitive dissonance in the mind of the speaker, as he is effectively adopting a separate personality for his outward appearance.
Assertive communication is an effective style of speech for virtually every situation. With assertive speech, the speaker's true thoughts and feelings are conveyed in a clear and appropriate manner. Unlike aggressive speech, assertive communication is open-minded and involving of other participants. However, the assertive speaker does not restrain himself, as does the passive speaker. From an external perspective, the assertive speaker appears open and honest. Therefore, others are likely to respond well to an assertive style of speaking, regardless of the situation.