Recreate your most treasured moments, such as memorable dates. Have a date night where you dress up for your spouse and rekindle the flames. Fetch an old photo album or a video tape and watch it together. Share your feelings about what was going through your mind at that moment in time. Taking the trip down memory lane helps you remember what made you fall in love in the first place.
Spice up your love life. Sex is an essential tool to help couples bond in a marriage. After 20 years, your love life may have become boring and routine -- and not the priority it was when you first got married. Discard the "I'm too tired" line and change things up to make your sex life more exciting. Try out new positions; you can send your kids to a friend's and have the house all to yourselves.
Change your wardrobe or get a new haircut. Make an extra effort to draw your spouse's attention so he can still boast about you to his friends. If you normally wear a baggy T-shirt to bed, surprise your spouse with lacy lingerie; make the effort to look good in bed.
Show up at your spouse's workplace with roses or lunch. Give her gifts for no special occasion. If you've run out of gift ideas, try a personal gift. For example, write 20 love letters for every year you have been together. Light scented candles in your bedroom and allow your husband to walk in and find you in a sexy outfit.
Find activities that you both enjoy. Take a cooking class or a dancing class together. Take time to do household chores together. These activities can be a time for the two of you to bond.