The aim with positive discipline is to teach children important life skills, including responsibility, self-discipline and problem-solving. Positive discipline requires kindness but also firmness. The focus is on teaching him to behave and control himself instead of punishing him. Use nonverbal signs to help remind him about things that he should do. In advance, plan these signs and tell him what the sign means. Signs like an empty cup turned over at the kitchen table means that he needs to get dressed before he eats. Play a little game to introduce this sign. Use dolls or soft toys, turn over a cup, and then role-play that they want a drink but they have to get dressed first.
Creating an environment where everyone wins is achieved by encouraging behavior, and making the activity appropriate for the preschoolers. Clear communication is important and by limiting her choices, you are limiting the opportunities for conflicts. A bedtime game where you let her choose between two bedtime stories helps to teach her to think about what she wants. Use this way of limiting choices by saying, "Do you want an apple or a banana?" instead of saying "Do you want any fruit?" Ask older preschoolers to ask these kinds of questions themselves. Prompt them by saying "Today, I can choose between the red jumper and the striped jumper."
Take time to listen to each other, and try to understand what he means. Play little games where you say things as clearly as possible or as unclearly as possible. This activity helps him to listen and to reflect on what you are saying. Make sure that you have eye contact when you talk to each other. Closeness and hugs are part of positive discipline. Say, "I like everything" or "I like blue socks." Talk about what it means to like everything. Prompt him by asking, "Do you like teddy?" Use extreme ideas to help him understand that when you use an unclear message, it is possible to interpret it in a range of ways.
Doing things together rather than asking her to do things by herself creates a friendly environment. Make the activity engaging by creating games; for example, where you pick up as many toys as possible in 30 seconds. Beating the clock turns the chore to pick up toys into a game. Set a timer for the activity. Create a wheel of choices where she can pick an activity that she wants to do. Draw a big circle and divide it into wedges. Make the wheel together and let her suggest things that she wants to include. This wheel can act as a good distraction when you are having a conflict. Let her choose an activity and then you can do the thing that you wanted.