When talk turns to bullying, many are eager to point the finger at the bullies themselves, contending that if these children would be more civil to their peers, bullying wouldn't occur. While it is true that the power to stop bullying is in the hands of the bullies, stopping the bullying behavior may not be as simple as it initially seems. For most bullies, the choice to engage in bullying behavior is not consciously made. Instead, these youths, who are likely troubled themselves, fall into bullying because they are compensating for some inadequacy in their life or trying to make up for feelings of worthlessness by engaging in a behavior that makes them feel powerful. Bullies who recognize, and want to correct, their bullying ways can do so first by admitting that they are bullying and then by seeking help from a trusted adult who can help them deal with the underlying issues that are leading them to bully in the first place.
The bullied, or children who are faced with physical or verbal abuse from peers, are the victims in a bullying situation. Depending on the type and severity of bullying, bullied children can suffer from feelings of powerlessness and, after while, begin to question their own self-worth. Often bullied children are hesitant to ask for help because they feel ashamed about the fact that they are being bullied. Individuals who witness someone being bullied can help the victim by reaching out to him or encouraging him to speak up. Bullied individuals who are brave enough to reach out for help themselves can speak to adults they trust and work to surround themselves with peers who treat them with the respect they deserve.
Parents face a serious challenge when it comes to dealing with bullying. Because bullying often takes place outside of the home, it can seem next to impossible for parents of bullies to stop their children from bullying. Likewise, parents of bullied children will find it difficult to help their children deal with this emotional stress. Because parents often feel so out of control when it comes to dealing with bullying, they may become frustrated or even angry about the issue. While nothing can fully ensure that a child doesn't feel the effects of bullying or become a bully herself, parents can focus on being present in their children's lives, watch for signs of bullying, including emotional withdrawal or depression, and teach their children that bullying is bad.
Much bullying takes place when children gather together at school, giving teachers the serious and important responsibility of confronting this bullying. For educators, however, it can be hard to know exactly when to intervene. Children picking on each other is hardly a new phenomenon, and teachers often can't confront every single instance of conflict they encounter. But with instances of bullying escalating, more teachers are dedicating themselves to dealing with the issue instead of simply hoping that kids work it out on their own. Teachers can effectively confront bullying by not just punishing the bully, but also reaching out to the bullied child. Teachers should also report any instances of bullying they encounter to administrators to ensure that they are dealt with before the situation escalates.