* Expand on existing points: Instead of making brief statements, the student needs to delve deeper into each idea, providing more information and context.
* Provide more examples: Generalizations need to be backed up with specific examples, evidence, or illustrations.
* Offer more analysis: The student may have presented facts but hasn't analyzed their significance or explained *why* they are relevant to the essay's argument.
* Show a deeper understanding: The essay may show basic knowledge, but the teacher wants to see evidence of a more thorough and nuanced understanding of the topic.
* Connect ideas more clearly: The essay's points might be disjointed. More elaboration is needed to show how the different parts of the essay relate to each other and contribute to the overall argument.
In short, the teacher wants a richer, more detailed, and more persuasive essay. The student needs to go beyond simply stating facts or opinions and instead explain, illustrate, and analyze them thoroughly.