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What is an opening sentence for a tall tale?

Here are a few opening sentences for a tall tale, playing with different styles and tones:

Humorous:

* "Now, I ain't one to brag, but that catfish I caught was bigger'n a houseboat, and I'm tellin' you, it had teeth like a banjo pickin' bear!"

* "Let me tell you about the time I met a squirrel who could talk, play the fiddle, and wore a monocle."

* "My grandma always said, 'Never trust a man with a beard the color of a ripe watermelon,' and she was right, because that's the day I met a man who could grow trees out of his nose."

Mysterious:

* "The fog rolled in thick that night, and when it lifted, a giant, glowing beetle with eyes like burning coals stood on the mountain peak."

* "The old folks whispered tales of a hidden valley where the river flowed backward and the trees spoke in riddles."

* "The moon was as red as blood that night, and the old woman's prediction came true - the mountains themselves started to sing."

Action-packed:

* "The moment the coyote howled at the full moon, the ground began to shake, and a whole herd of wild mustangs stampeded straight through our town square!"

* "I was ridin' through the desert, hotter than a blacksmith's forge, when a tornado full of armadillos whipped up outta nowhere!"

* "With a lightning-fast draw, I whipped out my lasso and caught the runaway meteor before it could crash into the town."

Remember, the key to a good tall tale opening is to grab the reader's attention and make them want to hear more!

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